Splat Mat- How I Love Thee

DAYTIME. INTERIOR. There are two characters SPLAT MAT & ME. ME is walking through the aisles of a store that caters to little people of all ages. Hello by Lionel Ritchie can be heard in the background. SPLAT MAT: Hello? ME stops and tries to identify who or what is calling her. SPLAT MAT: IsContinue reading “Splat Mat- How I Love Thee”

Daily Rituals: Part 1- Coffee

I’m gonna come out and say it- I am NOT a morning person by choice. So, of course, I was blessed with a child who loves to wake up early. It starts off quietly. I hear some movement and I whisper to myself oh please no. Then I hear umgedigadigo… I think to myself – OkayContinue reading “Daily Rituals: Part 1- Coffee”

My Wife Has A Cold! Help!

We’ve all heard of the Man Cold, right? You know, when grown men act like toddlers and the world ends because they got a sniffle? For the sake of full disclosure – as a man and a husband, I have most certainly experienced a Man Cold. The six words that strike fear into the heart ofContinue reading “My Wife Has A Cold! Help!”

Feline Fury: The One About Naps

Lady Butler, My love for naps knows no bounds. I nap anytime, anywhere. One of my favourite places to nap is your lap. It’s been one of my favourites since I was a kitten. I know I’m adorable, soft and cuddly. I also know that you find it hard to keep your paws to yourselfContinue reading “Feline Fury: The One About Naps”

Gross Isn’t It?

I was sitting beside my wife in the delivery room as a nurse attempted the Epidural administration. It’s an unpleasant procedure that forces a large needle into the spine via the lower back. As the tube was shoved home, my wife began to close her eyes, grasping on the bars of her bed. It wasContinue reading “Gross Isn’t It?”

Some People Cope Well With Exhaustion – I Am Not One Of Them

Some people cope well with exhaustion. I am not one of them. Some people get up after a rotten night’s sleep, try to wake themselves with a hot shower, then slug back a coffee or two. By the time they’ve left the house, you wouldn’t know they’d hardly slept. I am not one of thoseContinue reading “Some People Cope Well With Exhaustion – I Am Not One Of Them”

Feline Fury – The One About The Dog

Lady Butler, Who or what is that furry thing? Never mind. Let me address the source. Heh….Heh….what is wrong with your tail? Oh boy, you sure do move around a lot. Why are you here? HEY! What are you trying to sniff back there? Excuse me? What do you think you are doing eating myContinue reading “Feline Fury – The One About The Dog”

How Is Married Life?

The question that has plagued all newlyweds from the first day they got married and for apparently the years to come after the wedding. My wife and I got married about a year ago and this question still seems like an appropriate question to ask. It’s usually asked by those people that have lost touchContinue reading “How Is Married Life?”

Feline Fury: The One About The Throne

Lady Butler, Hi. Me again. The one commonly referred to as Big Baby. I can’t help but notice that an extra throne has been brought into Mi Casa. Unlike my throne, everyone sits around this new throne while eating. I know you’ll come home any day now with my new throne. Don’t worry, I’ll act surprisedContinue reading “Feline Fury: The One About The Throne”

The Sleeping Genie

Have you heard the story about the sleeping genie? No?.. okay the story goes like this: When the baby falls asleep a genie appears. POOF.. The genie offers you three choices. You can choose to write, to clean or to sleep uninterrupted. The choice must be made quickly as you only have a limited amountContinue reading “The Sleeping Genie”